Disagree vs. Hate

big•ot noun \ˈbi-gət\ : a person who strongly and unfairly dislikes other people, ideas, etc. : a bigoted person; especially : a person who hates or refuses to accept the members of a particular group (such as a racial or religious group)

http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/bigot

I have seen this word tossed around a lot in the past few days in reference to Christians with a traditional view on sin according to the Bible. I think I have it figured out, non-believers can’t fathom disagreeing with something and still being able to love the person. As Christians, that is what we are called to do. I’m a strong believer in the word of God and I know that is getting less and less popular these days but popularity has never mattered that much to me anyway.

I grew up in a very Christian home, my parents were (and continue to be) missionaries in South America. I grew up in a third world country being home schooled by my parents (“Well, she must be socially retarded!”). I have cared for the sick, homeless, hungry and widowed with no regard to their faith, color, age or sexual preference. But more than that, I’ve LOVED these people (some being strangers and others being close friends)! Some of my friends and I have had vastly different views on things like politics, religion, drugs & sexuality and we still manage to love and respect one another.

What I get tired of is hearing “how Christians are supposed to act” by non-Christians. “You’re supposed to be accepting and loving.” We are supposed to love our neighbor but are not called to accept sin! This is not a debate on homosexuality, I don’t want to open that can of worms, it’s about Christians being mislabeled or maybe misunderstood is a better term. I have “tolerated” HUNDREDS of posts about “marriage equality” and have never tried to censor my friends (or anyone else for that matter) because their views differ from mine and I expect the same courtesy.

A few of my friends have posted, “'You are not some sort of “Patriot, fighting for the First Amendment rights of all Americans” if the only time you get upset about a person’s “rights being trampled” is when it happens to people who think exactly like you...And if the only free speech that you support is speech that you agree with, that doesn’t make you a “patriot.” It makes you a hypocrite. And that’s something completely different.” And that is true, however, Christians don’t have the power to censor things we disagree with, we are a minority. If that were the case, Miley Cyrus, Justin Bieber and Kim & Kanye wouldn’t be nearly as popular.

When you ask a Christian what their view of sin is, be prepared to hear their honest opinion. Don’t ask someone a question that you have an idea what the answer is and then get mad at them for having a differing opinion from yours. Saying, “Here are my beliefs according to the Bible.” And going on to say, “It isn’t my job to discriminate/pass judgment, it’s my job to love.” Is not “spewing hate” or being intolerant. Firing someone for having Christian values and sharing them when asked is pretty intolerant though.

Don’t tell me that my faith is full of intolerant bigots, my church loves everyone. Sure, there are folks out there that claim to be Christians and do not walk the walk (Looking at you Westboro) but that is like saying, “all blondes are airheads” or, “you must be an addict if you have tattoos”. I really dislike generalizations!

It is A&Es right, as an employer, to fire or suspend anybody they want to. They may have a lot of angry fans and may even lose the whole Robertson family. Do I think it was a mistake on their part? Yes. But it was their choice to make. I stand behind Phil because he was asked a question and answered it honestly and according to his beliefs. I stand behind him because he is my brother in Christ! He could have betrayed his beliefs to appeal to the general public but he stood firm on his faith and I applaud that! He didn’t hurt anyone, he didn’t promote hate (quite the opposite).

I wish all the folks on social media could keep it civil (both sides). There have been hurtful words exchanged between strangers and between people that, at some point, called one another “friends”. Yes, I’ve seen things on friends’ facebook walls these past few days that I disagree with but I don’t hate them! I’ll still hang out with them, our kids will still play together and we will continue to love each other. It all comes down to respecting views that differ from your own. Disagree, sure! Just don’t disrespect.

Tortellini soup

I made a pot of the best tortellini soup this weekend! It didn’t take long to make it on the stove and I will be making this again soon.

What you’ll need:

1 package tortellini from the refrigerated section.

1 Box veggie broth

1 (or 2) cans of Italian diced tomatoes

8 oz of cream cheese

1 cup Italian shredded cheese blend

several handfuls of fresh baby spinach

garlic or garlic powder to taste

Start with the broth, tomatoes, garlic, cheese and cream cheese and heat until cream cheese is completely melted and soup is boiling. Add tortellini and spinach, cover and simmer for 20 min or until tortellini is fully cooked. Even my picky husband and 2 year old liked it! I will be making this a lot this winter.

Charlie's soap

I recently had the chance to use some Charlie’s liquid laundry soap and their Oxygen Bleach. I mostly used it on diapers and on the girls’ clothes. I make my own laundry soap usually, but wanted to try something store bought. I LOVE the Oxygen Bleach! It does a great job on the diapers. With two girls (2&1/2 and 10 months) in cloth diapers, things get stinky around here pretty quick. The Oxygen Bleach does better than anything else I’ve tried on stinky diapers. I put two tablespoons of it in the wash and let the diapers soak before the wash cycle. It really did a great job!

I will probably stick with my homemade soap because it works just as well, and it’s cheaper (though I really liked the Charlie’s liquid a lot). However, I will probably switch from Oxy Clean to the Charlie’s Oxygen Bleach because it is truly superior and a little bit goes a long way!!

Pump and dump: Pouring liquid gold down the drain

We have been suffering from seasonal allergies and sinus junk in my house for a good 3 weeks and I finally had to break down and go to a walk-in clinic on Tuesday night because on top of a pounding head and intense sinus pressure (nothing new for me). I also started having severe pain in my left ear. We're talking ice pick to the ear drum kind of pain.

I saw a nurse practitioner at the walk in clinic that told me I had an ear infection and a sinus infection (as I suspected) and wrote me a prescription for a Z-pack. He then informed me that I would have to quit nursing my 9 month old because the antibiotic crosses in the breast milk and it could cause a reaction or resistance in the baby. I begged for something else and he told me he would tell me the same thing no matter which antibiotic he prescribed. I was on the verge of tears when I left the office.

When I got in the car, I immediately called a family friend, who is a nurse and has worked as a lactation consultant, and cried on her shoulder. After talking and going over our options, she instructed me to talk to the pharmacist about it and see what he said. When I talked to him, he acted like it was a low risk and it would “probably be okay”, but to watch her for signs of digestive distress or other reactions.

The lactation consultant and I decided it was probably okay to nurse at night, but just to be safe I am giving her milk from my freezer stash (Hey, that is what it’s there for). In order to keep my supply up, I have to pump and dump. Yesterday alone I dumped over 10 oz! I may have shed a tear over it.

I’ve gotten some judgment over it, with people telling me it is totally unnecessary to pump and dump, but in all honesty I’d rather be safe than sorry. Chris, Zoey and I are all allergic to different antibiotics, so I don’t want to cause any issues with my baby if I can help it.

I’m not ready or willing to end our breast feeding relationship, yet, and more importantly, neither is the baby. She has a hard time taking a bottle from me and it breaks my heart a little each time I have to give her one.

These couple of weeks won’t be easy, but I’m just going to do the best I can.

What is the big deal with Disney princesses?

I’m not sure why Disney Princesses are getting such a bad reputation these days. Sure, some of them aren’t modestly dressed (I’m looking at you, Jasmine), but some of them love to read (Belle) or are great warriors (Mulan) or fight for their own rights to NOT marry (Merida). I’m not saying these princesses need to be our daughters’ only role models, but to ban Disney Princesses from my household is just too extreme for me. I am all for Disney making more empowered, self-reliant princesses, including princesses with a more realistic body and not so much cleavage showing.

My oldest daughter loves Beauty and the Beast and Tangled, but she also loves Iron Man, Hulk, Bible class, singing “Jesus Loves Me”, reading, wearing Mommy’s shoes, playing outside and many other things. We don’t let Belle or Rapunzel take over her life. She is a little girl and little girls like princesses.

I think responsibility for who our kids look up to falls on us as parents and each parent should make decisions for themselves. If you don’t want princesses in your house, that is fine with me. If I never spent any time with my children and only let them watch Disney movies, then sure, they might become obsessed with princesses. We do a lot of things besides watch movies and play dress-up. Children need to be well-rounded and that is part of our job as parents. Nobody freaks out over boys watching super heroes, afraid they will be obsessed with learning to fly and being disappointed when they don’t have supersonic speed. They are kids. Let them enjoy fantasy for a while.

My little princess in her Halloween costume (made by myself and my mother-in-law).

Like cheerios in a highchair

A fellow mom gave me some truly uplifting words the other day. I was feeling bad for going to work that morning (more so than usual) because Zoey cried and begged me not to leave her. I was talking about how hard it was and my friend (and fellow mom) began to tell me what a great job I do as a mother. She told me that I must be doing the “mom thing” right. She said that as a preschool worker she had seen kids that hated going home at night. She praised me for being a good mother and it truly made me feel better. When I thanked her for her kind words she said, “This mom thing is a hard gig! We gotta stick together like Cheerios on a high chair.” I love that quote!

We are all doing the best we can. It’s so easy to look at Mary Jane down the street and say, “She doesn’t nurse” or “She got an epidural” or “She posted a picture of her kid eating a McDonald’s chicken nugget!” and we don’t always stop so see the whole picture. Maybe she tried to nurse and couldn’t (or just didn’t want to), maybe her birth plan was different than yours or her pain was greater than yours was, maybe she spent all day running errands or was sick and just wanted to feed her kids a quick dinner. Maybe that working mom that you look down on is working so that she can give her kids a better life and a better future.

We should be “sticking together like cheerios in a high chair.” Motherhood is a sisterhood. Sometimes it gets lonely. You have a baby and your friends give you space and then you drift apart. Let’s work on building each other up and cheering each other on! You know how nice it is when someone says or does something nice for you, so why not spread that around? Let’s work on our relationships with fellow moms! It’s time to be Cheerios!

So you want to go on a road trip?

So you want to go on a road trip? Well, my little family has been on a couple of road trips over the past couple of weeks and they have gone better than I expected because I really prepared a lot for it.

I kept an eye on sales at Walmart and Target and got some Color Wonder supplies, crayons, note pads and stickers. We also got a portable DVD player on sale at Best Buy and took all our Disney movies (Thanks Trey). Lots of Kum & Go stations have Redbox kiosks, so we were even able to rent a DVD or two. A cooler full of drinks and snacks was Daddy’s brilliant idea!

We made frequent stops to stretch legs, go to the bathroom and to nurse the baby. We stopped at a couple of free local attractions along the way to run off a little energy and tried to find kid friendly places to eat (Steak N Shake and Chick-fil-A top the list). We may not be making the best drive time, but sometimes slow and steady wins the race.