Sometimes as a mom we experience what I like to call “Mom guilt”. I experience this when I am feeding my 3 month old and my older daughter (almost two) is crying for me to come play with her or when I put little sister in her Rock n Play and big sister in her high chair so I can run to the bathroom while they both scream their heads off. Mom guilt comes a lot more often now that I have two daughters to split my time with. I have a laundry list of things that need to get done around the house that never seems to be empty and I find myself staying up late so I can fold laundry and unload the dishwasher.
I have friends that either don’t have kids, just have one or have older children and either don’t know or don’t remember how busy a mom with a new baby AND a toddler really is! I don’t always have time to call and text like I use to. I feel so isolated sometimes. Friends will say “I never hear from you anymore” and I apologize but a little part of me is thinking “I don’t hear from you much either”. I feel like a bad friend because I can’t keep up with everyone like I want to and so now I have “Friend guilt” too.
It’s hard to get out of the house with two girls under the age of two. We have different nap times and somebody is almost always hungry. Friends want to go to the mall or to lunch and I want so badly to go and spend time with people my own age but I just can’t. A girlfriend came by to hang out a few days before my birthday because a sick 22 month old kept me home when we were supposed to have a fun birthday lunch with friends. It was so nice to have a friend over! My house was a mess and I hadn’t showered all day but I didn’t feel judged at all. IT. WAS. BLISS. I had felt so awful for having to cancel my lunch plans and was so disappointed to miss out on girl time so it meant a lot to have her come to me!
I’m just having a hard time meeting everyone else’s needs and still finding time to eat and sleep. Sometimes I get overwhelmed when I’ve been doing things for everyone else all day (laundry, dishes, errands and such) and I have a toddler begging for cookies right before dinner and a baby crying to be nursed while I’m trying to get dinner ready. I feel like I’m losing my mind at times!
I don’t want a break from my kids or my husband, I want a break from cooking, cleaning and everything else. I want a personal assistant, a maid and a chef please!
If you have a friend with a new(ish) baby and she hasn’t called in a while, give her a call and tell her you love her. Offer to bring lunch and a chick flick over one day and let her know you still love her (even though she may not currently be nurturing your friendship like she used to).
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